Not Myself.

Sometimes i wonder if i'm suffering from depression. Cause my mood are real extreme? It's like i'm either real happy or i'm damn emo. I seldom or rarely find myself in between those zones. I'm not sure if it's the sagittarius thing? But it's really not a good thing to me.

I've been feeling perfectly fine and cheerful for the days in 2013 so far. It's just that recently, like a week or so, i'm really feeling as though i'm uber down. Not sure if it's cause of the exam stress that's kicked in. But i really don't feel good. Like ytd, while on my way home, I suddenly teared while listening to "if i were a boy". i really dont know why!!

 

And sometimes, i feel really "friend-less". I often tell my friends that i have no friends. But what they'll tell me back in respond is the opposite, which is i appear to have lotsa them. But idk, i just feel i have zero. I will have a feeling that people are your friend cause they want something from you? Like once they've "made use" of you, they'll leave your sight. I really hate that feeling. But i can't deny that that's how i feel. I really have no idea who are the real friends and who the ones that just come and go. Call me paranoid or lack of security. But that's just how I am. It's like sometimes if i were to text that friend and i don't get any reply back when i need some advise or a listening ear from that someone. It totally sucks y'know!

Like you thought that person is really your friend who's gonna be there for you no matter what but...it's just plain disappointment! And i do admit that sometimes i don't reply people's text. And that's cause i'm plain lazy and the content isn't really v.important. So i really don't feel like responding. And of course, i do know who's the ones that are there all the while.

Whatever it is now, i just don't feel like updating anything at all. On facebook or instagram. The 2 most sites i frequent usually. Only place for me to "vend" everything out is...twitter&here. Cause it's more private. oknvm forget bout my illogical thinking.